Change

It has been a few months since I've last blogged. Truth is, life has changed. All of it. On March 13th, 2010 at approximately 6:45pm Ryan got down on one knee and asked me to be his wife.


Things haven't been the same since. Overwhelmed with joy and equipped with a sincere determination to marry the man I met back in January of last year, I've started to plan the day we will become one person. You know it's funny...I never thought it would feel quite like it does. It's taken up until about a few weeks ago to have any of it feel real to me. With the weight of school on my shoulders, I couldn't allow myself to get too caught up in the excitement. Now that the stress is gone, the door is open to allow myself to fall in. It's been such an awakening. I never realized how stressful, how busy things would become in such a few short months. It's put a strain on every area of my life -- even my relationship with Ryan. Although there are spats here and there, I am confident this incredible juggling act we've been performing will only bring us closer together. As excited as I am to become 'one' I am much more excited to be 'one.'

Tonight is also my first day back from West Virgina. It was incredible to see all the places where Ryan grew up. His first school, his church, his childhood home. Where he played after school, where he peed off a cliff. You name it. I now know it all.

After a week of solid togetherness, it feels nice to be back in our town where I have all of my firsts. Tonight I felt such a need to sing. It's been a while, as I've been so busy. But I open my mouth and the vocal chords go to work. What a release from all the pent up emotions. What a blessing to be able to express it all through my favorite medium. I sometimes wonder how the songs will change. You know how songs chronicle your life at that particular moment. At least, I am that way. It's astounding to think at this very moment next year I will be in a different house with a different name.

I thank God, I've been fortunate to find the life that I have. I know it's no accident, I am very much aware that I could not have built this by myself. God is the master artist and what a picture He has given me to gaze upon! I feel so guilty as He has had to take 2nd priority some days and nights. I miss reading in depth. But I will make an effort to pick that back up this summer. I feel like more than anything my life is becoming ministry. The small chances I am able to have at work or walking down the aisles of the supermarket to share the love of Christ will have to suffice over volunteering long hours. But I have the hope of one day soon tacking that back on too...we will have to see.

What else? Programming is chugging along. I will begin looking for internships somewhat soon. But even though I feel confident in programming, reading job requirements I feel quite confident shooting for Unix/Linux as well. I am amazed how much I have absorbed in just a short year and a half. My geekdom is growing! But I thirst for more! I will have the summer off (as my courses are not offered in the summer that I need). I will pick up COBOL, VB, and Systems Analysis in the Fall, with the capstone grad course in the Spring. May 2011 should hold a degree for me. I can then start looking at FSU and other schools for online bachelor degree programs. Probably leaning towards FSU at this point pending a trip to Tallahassee. We will have to see.

Other than that, just sitting back enjoying the view. I wouldn't bet on blog posts at the rate I typically post as I am losing my grip on ample computer time these days. After the wedding and honeymoon perhaps! =0)

Hope all is well...